My Testimony

Growing up in southern Ontario, I never knew anything about God nor did I care to know. Except for the odd time when I went to the Anglican parish with my maternal grandmother as a child, I never went to church. My family did not readily practice or profess any religion in particular, so the scriptures were never taught in our home. This was my life and all I knew.

As a teenager, I really began “living it up” and doing things “my way.” By the age of 18 I was a total party girl; dancing, drinking and drugs were all I knew and all I wanted. As the god of my universe, I was always looking out for “number one,” only desiring to satisfy my flesh and the lusts thereof. This self-absorbed life lead me to severe bouts of depression. Finally, at the age of 20 I was suicidal and at the end of myself.

August that year saw me working in downtown Calgary. While I was on shift one day, an older man came into my work looking for directions to a store close by. After several unfruitful attempts trying to help him find his way, I decided to take him there myself. As we walked he told me he was a street preacher downtown. I was shocked as I had never known anyone to do such a thing; I thought, “What would possess an old man to stand on a street corner shouting a message to every passer-by?” Before he left, the older man handed me a little white pamphlet. He asked my name and told me he would be praying for me and then walked out of my life. To this day I do not know who he was….

I do not remember much about that pamphlet, but I do remember looking at it sitting on my dresser in my apartment. Actually, I remember it sitting there for several days. For some reason, I did not want to read it, however I also could not bring myself to throw it out. I do not know how long it sat there, but I do recall curiosity finally getting the better of me. I picked it up and began reading its little white pages. Even though the pamphlet only shared, and explained, several verses out of the Bible, what I read shook me to the core. The words on the pages exposed me for who, and what, I really was within my heart. I knew that everything I read in that pamphlet was the truth — God’s truth.

That night I tried to escape the thoughts that plagued me; thoughts of my sin and offense towards a righteous and holy God, as well as the consequences of disobeying his commandments. I went to bed drugged up trying to escape, however my conscience wouldn’t let me off that easy. I ended up having the most horrible nightmare. I dreamt I was standing before God, giving an account for my life and the sins I had committed: drugs, booze, immorality, lying, stealing and pride, to name a few. I knew punishment was coming and I knew it was an eternity burning in Hell. Nothing I could do could save me from the future that awaited me….

I tried to find “religion” after that terrifying night. I tried to please God by being a better person so that he would spare me. I began going to church. I tried living a better life. I did less drugs and drank less often, trying to clean up my life. My work was futile; nothing I could do would satisfy the payment for the sins I had committed. Nothing I could do would take away the guilt of my soul. Even though I was trying to do more “good” things, I still had a gnawing emptiness within me. All the while, I was still bound for Hell.

In March of the following year, I met a young man. He was very kind and sincere and I immediately noticed something different in him. After that encounter, we agreed to keep in touch. One Friday night in April he asked me to go to church with him and for some odd reason, I agreed.

I do not remember what the pastor said, nor what was done or sung that night; all I remember is feeling something I had been suppressing for a long time — conviction. My sin was something I did not want to admit, nor something I wanted to give up. I knew that before God, the Holy and Righteous Judge, I was guilty, yet up until this point I did not want to confess it. God had been using events in my life to show me that there was no salvation or redeeming quality within myself. There was no way I could work my way into Heaven.

On the drive home, the young Christian man asked me if I wanted to be saved from eternal damnation and punishment in Hell. He then took out a Bible (in my 21 years I had never seen a Bible before!) and a little gospel pamphlet such as the one I had been given by the older man 8 months before, and explained to me how every person on earth has sinned, including myself. As a result of breaking God’s laws, I was guilty before Him. Because of the filthy rags of sin I wore, I could not find an eternal home in Heaven as God cannot look upon sin. Needless to say, that meant I had an eternity of Hell to await me so that I could pay for the sins I had committed.

But there was hope. Because God is not willing that any should perish, he provided a way for me to be reconciled to Him. He sent his Son, Jesus Christ, from Heaven to earth. He lead a sinless, perfect life. Because of this, He was despised and rejected of men. He was crucified on a cross, taking the punishment for my sins, as well as the sins of the whole world upon himself bodily.

Jesus Christ did not stay dead, however. He rose from the dead three days after his crucifixion, conquering death, Hell, and the grave.

Jesus did nothing to deserve this cruel treatment, however he did it willingly so that I did not have to pay for my sins and guilt in Hell for all eternity. Instead, He did it so that I could have an eternal home with Him in Heaven. This is God’s free gift to all of mankind.

When the young Christian man finished explaining what God had done because of his love for me, I repented of my sin and asked God to save me from an eternity in Hell. I confessed to God in prayer that, even though I deserve the eternal damnation, I was thankful for Jesus Christ, God’s perfect Son, who died and took my punishment in my place. The weight I had been carrying of my sin and my guilt faded. I was forgiven! I had been born-again; I had been born spiritually. That day was April 10, 1998; four days before my 21st birthday.

The story does not end there, however. On March 13, 1999, that young Christian man who lead me to the Lord and I were married. Since my salvation, the Lord has been doing an amazing work in my life daily, and for that I am truly grateful. I no longer desire the life I used to lead. God has completely changed my ways and I have truly become a new creature {“Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.” 2 Corinthians 5:17} There is a new song in my mouth and new life in my heart.

This site is meant to give praise and glory to my Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ, for what he has done for my soul. Without Jesus and his shed blood for me, none of this would be possible. I am so very thankful I am now certain that I can look forward to an eternity in Heaven with Him.

If you would like to know for yourself what God says about how you can be 100% sure you are going to Heaven when you die, please read the information under the “Your Destiny” tab at the top of this page. The gift is free and the decision is yours….

“Thanks be unto God for his unspeakable gift.”

2 Corinthians 9:15